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The [Condensed] Soup: July 25

1. Wanna Be On Top?

This Buzzfeed article chronicling the 29 Most Ridiculous Moments in "America's Next Top Model" History took me on a major journey through memory lane.  I used to be obsessed with this show.  Which is odd because any time someone saw how tall I was, they would say something along the lines of "wow, you should model" (not taking into consideration my lack of coordination/model features) and I would just scoff at the idea.  No part of me ever wanted to do anything of that nature, but for some reason this show was one of my favorites.  I think it was more of a guilty pleasure than anything, especially considering how incredibly absurd Tyra Banks was on the show (and probably still is).  
My obsession sort of tapered off when I realized how truly ridiculous the photoshoots and challenges were getting, but those weekend marathons were the during my early teen years.  ANTM marathons = the original Netlflix binge-watching. If would be forever grateful to anyone who could point me in the direction of an online archive with all the seasons!

2. Tinderella

There is really no explanation needed for this one.  Tinderella: A Modern Fairy Tale is pretty hilarious, regardless of whether or not you've used Tinder.  Also, check out this Thought Catalog article on why some people feel like Tinder is cool, but other dating websites aren't.  It's pretty interesting. My personal favorite line is:
"People - well, mostly millennials - are so afraid to let anyone know that we crave something deeper than the ephemeral."
so. freakin. true.

3.  An Open Letter to Employers

Most, if not all, of us millennials struggle with a job search at some point.  It sucks.  Every single aspect of it from the resume editing and cover letter writing to the interviews and the possibility of rejection is stressful and draining.  Sometimes you feel like there's never any hope and that no one wants to hire you.  Been there, done that.  This writer from Elite Daily decided to write an open letter to all the employers who didn't hire her and it is so relatable.  She hits on every feeling you've ever felt while searching for your dream job and it really feels like she's writing this in behalf of all of us who've been there at one point or another.  Definitely a recommended read for both employed and unemployed post-grads.

4. Rue La La

As usual, Rue La La is killing it with the sales.  Occasionally I'll find myself not loving the sales or not seeing anything worth buying, but lately they are amazing.  Included in the several sales going on are some from Alex & Ani, Ray Ban, and Nicole Miller.  Not to mention a bunch of other random sales containing things from Sperry Topsider and Lilly Pulitzer.  If you're not a member, click here for an invite!
Here are some of my favorites available right now for a limited time:

5. #BackThatAzzUp

This week we're gonna throw it back a little bit.  Do you ever randomly decide to put your entire iTunes library on shuffle? I do it all the time and I'm telling you, it is the best way to rediscover old favorites.  Since this jam came on shuffle the other day I've been singing it for a straight week.... and I'm not the least bit mad. 

Happy weekend, people!

Stuff Bloggers Love That I Just Don't Get

I'm an avid blog reader.  I get endless outfit inspiration, recipe ideas (that I'll never actually try), and advice from the select blogs that I follow, and I really love it.  But there are just a few blog trends that I will never ever understand or be able to wrap my head around.  

I'm (sort of) sorry if these offend anyone but you know what.......

And how appropriate that it's Wednesday. Thanks Hannah Horvath for conveying my feelings so accurately.

Tulle skirts.

I was a ballerina for Halloween for, like, half my single-digit years so I know a tutu when I see one and these are basically tutus for adults.  Other than being part of a blog photo shoot, what purpose do these poofy, oversized skirts serve? I honestly cannot think of one occasion I would consider wearing one of these... except for Halloween. Or my 4th birthday party.

Photo shoots

I do not understand these daily photo shoots.  
Let me clarify something first: I love fashion blogs. I am constantly amazed by the girls who put together such envious outfits and can literally pull anything off if they accessorize it well. Please don't take this as me making fun of girls that post outfits because I truly love and admire them.  My lack of understanding tends to come off as snarky, when really it's just pure curiosity.  Because of this, I have a few genuine questions for fashion bloggers...
1. Who takes all your pictures? Do you have a trusty boyfriend that is willing to do that and, if so, does he have 6 foot tall brother you could set me up with?! The guys I typically associate myself with would probably never agree to do such things without a ton of bribery.
2. How do you find all of these magical locations? I live in a pretty awesome area, and even I don't think I could find enough pretty locations to make it seem like I wasn't shooting in the same place every single time.
3. Do people stare at you when you're posing for these pictures? In most outfit posts there are a decent amount of photos and, I'm assuming, several others that didn't make the cut.  Even a quick photo shoot probably takes 10 minutes, so do people just walk on by while you're doing this? I can't lie, if some chick was posing in an over-the-top outfit in a public place, trying to act nonchalant and not look at the camera, I'd probably stop and stare.  And maybe laugh.

Pattern Mixing

Who ever thought that floral, stripes, and chevron would all work in one outfit? Only fashion bloggers. I'd estimate about half the time, the pattern mixing turns out great and I have total outfit envy.  But then the other half of the time, the overwhelming mix of accessories and patterns just looks like a giant pile of mixed-up laundry or the set of "Saved By the Bell".


Like I said, I'm not trying to openly offend anyone here but WHY can't you just use names? I totally understand when mom bloggers only use the first letter of their kid's name like one of my favorite bloggers Ashley used to do with her kids.  In that case, you're protecting them and not giving out too much information.  Again, I get it.  But why why why why oh WHY do people insist on referring to their boyfriend/husband/slave as "hubs" "hubby" or "the hubster".  Why not be creative and make up a fun nickname like Arkansassy does, or maybe.... I don't know... just call him by his real name. He's an adult, not a pet, and if you're constantly tagging him on Instagram in your adorable couple-y photos, chances are everyone knows his name anyway. 
Who knows, maybe my frustration here stems from the fact that I don't have a husband to call "hubby", but I can assure you if I did, that's the last thing I would call him.  In my case, "poor sap" would probably be more appropriate.

Rock Studs

Am I the only person on this earth that finds these shoes absolutely hideous?! They seem insanely uncomfortable yet every big blogger has worn them in countless photo shoots since they came out.  I know Valentino was the originator of them and, as all trends go, there are countless imitators.  Regardless of what brand/price range they are, each and every version is absolutely cheap and tacky looking.  I'm sorry I just can't deal with these, someone explain them to me!

Got any to add to the list? I'd love to hear them!

The Hump Day Blog Hop

The [Condensed] Soup: July 18

1. The Ultimate Post-Grad Residence

Of the things that annoy the whiney and self-centered post-grad community (I'm one of them so I can say that), paying rent is definitely in the top 5.  In fact, it might be number 1.  Depending on the area in which you live, you could be coughing up about 50% of your paycheck just to live in a 400 square foot box that is filled with nothing but your millions of unnecessary clothes and assorted cheap, used, or stolen-from-your-parents-house furniture.  It's rough.
This guy decided to do something about it.  He decided to buy a bus for $3,000 (aka less than 4 months rent for some of us) and turn it into a kickass house on wheels. Seriously, you need to click on this link and check out the photos of this thing.  He thought of everything.  There's even room for guests! 
In the words of Elite Daily, this really is how you solve your #PostGradProblems!

2. They'll Never Understand Us

I stumbled upon this Thought Catalog article the other day and seriously LOLed the entire time.  It's a collection of 33 questions men want to ask women but are too afraid to ask, and I really can't even deny that most of them are pretty valid.  My personal favorite is #23: "Do you read minds? Because you so often assume that we can."  So true.  Sorry about that, guys. 
Oh, and the answer to #10? VERY

3. Animals Without Necks

So evidently I was not aware that there is an entire community on Reddit dedicated to posting photos of animals without necks.  WHY am I always the last to know?!  These are seriously some of the funniest photoshopped pictures I have ever laid my eyes on.  Check out a compilation of the best ones here.  I mean, the baby hippo?! I'm DYING.  Best useless trend ever. 

4. Nordstrom Anniversary Sale

Based on the amount of blogs posting absolutely nothing but their "faves" from the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale this whole week, you don't really need to know what mine are.  But I'm gonna do it anyway because there are a ton of pretty sick deals and because I've run out of things to post.  #sorry
As far as what to look out for,  the watches are probably the best deals you're ever gonna get next to buying a used broken one on Ebay.  Seriously, some are a full $100 off.  I'd also recommend checking out the North Face selection.  They have pretty amazing deals as well and you'll be thanking yourself when all those bad boys cost twice as much come winter!
Not worth browsing? shoes.  Other than a few deals I included above, I really didn't spot any major steals.

5. #BackThatAzzUp

This week I'm featuring a song that might not be a "jam" that you hear at the "club" (who do I think I am?), but it sure is funny as hell. 
Weird Al has done it again and turned a groovy song into something equal parts hilarious and informative.  I haven't been a huge fan of anything he's done since the iconic "Amish Paradise", but this right here is pure gold. 

What are you loving this week? Let me know! 

11 Ways To Know You're Insta-Famous

There's famous... and then there's Insta-Famous.  One involves being very talented in some capacity (or having a sex tape) and the other is based solely on the photos you post on a social media app.

1.  The first and most obvious way to know your insta-famous is the obscene amount of likes you get on even the most basic instas.  Oh, you have over 10k likes just on a picture you took of a Gatorade bottle an hour ago? Insta-famous. 

2. Your followers ask you where you got every single thing you're wearing in your photo.  Even if it's just a white tshirt and jeans.

3. Your followers know your boyfriend/husband/best friend/dog by their full name/nickname without ever having met them in person.

4. You have a few followers that immediately like all your photos within 3 minutes of you posting them, regardless of what is actually pictured in the photo.  Do these people ever get off Instagram? Probably not.

5. Followers tag their friends on your photos and say things like "I need her dress" or, if it's a photo of you and your equally as beautiful and well-dressed friends, they say "omg this is so us".

6. If you take a photo with or tag someone who is less insta-famous than you, their follower count immediately increases within an hour of you posting.  Even if they don't ever instagram anything interesting.

7. Rando men comment on your photos saying nonsensical things like "very much beauty" or "gorgeous girl care to speak?".  They typically are not from this country and get ignored by the insta-celebs.  Personally, if it were me, I'd follow them back for some confidence boosters every now and then. 

8. People comment asking you to "please follow back!!!!!!!"  These people are usually 13 year old girls.

9. Fights ensue between followers in your comments.  Typically these fights end up having absolutely nothing to do with the photo they're located underneath and involve followers like the ones mentioned in #3, #4, & #7.

10. If you ever post anything controversial, you immediately lose several followers and then gain twice as many as you lost due to the popularity of the controversy.

11. If you're really insta-famous, your most over-zealous followers (see #3) will turn being the "first  comment!!" on your photo into a giant competition.  However, this is usually reserved for actual, real-life celebrities.  And the girls from Dance Moms.

Do any of those things happen to you? Congrats, you're probably insta-famous.  Now go ponder about how little this matters and start editing your next photo.... your thousands of followers are waiting.

Road Trip Playlist

Road trips are my fave.   I don't know why, but I have always loved being in the car.  I never dreaded my 5 hour drive to and from where I attended college and I always looked forward to traveling around the Northeast for holidays.  For me, driving is relaxing.

If I'm not the one driving, I'll nap, watch a movie, or read a book but whatever I'm doing it always involves music.  A great playlist can make a road trip that much better, and no matter how long the drive I always have a ton of great songs lined up.  Below are just a few of my favorite road trip songs.... I may or may not have to make a few more of these!

What are some of your favorite road trip songs?

P.S. Speaking of road tripping, Rue La La is having a Road Trip Across America series and first up is Nantucket! They've compiled some of the best pieces that embody the style of Nantucket and, believe me when I say this, I need every single one in my closet right now.  The further I scrolled down, the more I wanted everything.  Here are some of my favorites (although I might as well just include the entire sale)

If you're not a member of Rue La La yet and want an invite, click here to sign up!


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